The next chapter….


384
hours in hospital … 
H O M E 

04-02-2017

Finally dropped home after a longggg wait!
Mums already practiced the needle thing in my belly didn’t even feel it! 
M🐻 built up the sofa so it’s easier for me to get up and down πŸ’œ
Linda came round and we had Chinese for tea 🍴 it was lovely! (Even if they did get my order wrong and take an hour to fix it πŸ™„)
So nice to be home with the puddy cat!!! 


Ready for my evening meds then off to bed!!

05-02-2017

I feel like I’m trapped in a body that refused to work. My mind set now I’m out of hospital is that I’m better however my body has other ideas. 😫😐
Bonus slept the best I have in months! I was so exhausted I was out like a light.
This mornings struggles frustrate me enormously and do not bode well for the next few weeks. 
Managed with a hell of a lot of help from my mum to have a shower and get fully dressed. (We have visitors later) 
So lovely to have my godmother round (Jill) ⭐️ Fire is roaring and conversation flowing ☺️ we’ve been saying how her children are so like her and how I’m so like my mum πŸ’œ


It’s the best feeling in the world sitting in front of this fire. 

MH is on the blink..posted a picture of my beasty (Wills) who passed a few years back and I completely fell to pieces 😭 no warning just tears upon tears.
The body armour: 


Although they tell me it’s helping it’s a 

B L O O D Y N I G H T M A R E

Brace is uncomfortable yet I feel helpless without it. Even being washed in my own bed I feel panicked at the slightest movement I make. C R A Z Y 😣
I’m so tired. My body physically aches yet I can’t sleep πŸ˜” my head is swimming with thoughts and feeling about things beyond my control πŸ™

06-02-2017

10 days count down till my birthday. πŸŽ‚
Been treated to some fabulous flowers 

                       πŸ’πŸ’œπŸ’β€οΈπŸ’


Definitely a spoilt girl πŸ˜…πŸ˜

Occupational therapy just left – made me do the stairs and show them how I was getting round. Even made me get in and out of bed! 

They contemplated getting me to show them how I get on and off the toilet 🚽 yeah sure I lost my dignity weeks ago πŸ˜‚ it’s fine. 

S H A T T E R E D πŸ˜΄πŸ’€
So I’ve literally slept since they left πŸ˜… tea, meds, bed. 

07-02-2017

So slept till 2pm and had soup for lunch. 

Had a lovely visit from Ella R and her mum Sharon πŸ‘― they brought treats and I was Seriously spoilt! 😍


When I studied at Reaseheath college there was a cafe called “bootzone” one of my favourite places! I used to spend most breaks in there eating and gossiping 😁 I’ve just had a lovely surprise, Rachel – one of my favourite ladies has seen and commented on my blog 😌 its so lovely that I’m reaching people that I thought I wouldn’t see again ❀️

08-02-2017

My bestie came round! She’s expecting again! She’s still a skinny Minnie though πŸ˜πŸ€” how does she do It!! Marriage is also on the cards so looks like I could finally be a bridesmaid! πŸ˜πŸ˜…πŸ˜πŸ‘—πŸΎ
Doing a fair amount of sleeping. But waking is improving! But as I’m told Rome wasn’t built in a day and I won’t recover as quickly as I’d like πŸ˜”πŸ˜

09-02-2017

Occupational therapy came this morning. Got me out the front door and into mums car ☺️πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸš™ was hard but great! 

Know I’ll be okay getting to Carrington tomorrow β˜ΊοΈπŸ¦„πŸŽ‰ P O N I E S!!!!

Falling asleep as I type on the sofa. It’s ridiculous how the slightest thing shatters me πŸ˜©πŸ˜΄πŸ’€
Dad visited. 
Eurgh!! The citizens advice man called 😴😷😐 did I want his help. Let me think. 

 N O T H A N K Y O U ! ! πŸ€”βœ‹πŸΌ
Time for a nap…going to attempt hair washing later πŸ˜‰πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ’†πŸΌπŸ’‡πŸΌ
So it’s half 8 and there’s been a bloody power cut. The whole house is down 😫😐

We’re down as an ‘priority’ case because the mother is disabled and I’ve broken my back 

10-02-2017

Healthy porridge for breakfast – twinkle enjoyed it too πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‚

​​
FINALLY GOT MY HAIR WASHED! πŸ’†πŸΌπŸšΏ

Mum was. TOTAL babe and figured out how to seat me and wash my hair over the sink 😁😁
Birthday treat to meeeee 


Flowers look gorgeous this morning!
Left over roast chicken sandwiches for lunch. 🍴
Unfortunately wasn’t well enough to make it to CRC πŸ˜” so no ponies just yet….
So..after 21 days of ‘captivity’ i ventured out with mum to lidl…well this didn’t go as planned. Guess it was a harsh reality check. 😭

Although I did get some nice new PJ bottoms πŸ˜πŸ‘–

Pain has beaten me today, feeling pretty crap – couldn’t even finish my tea πŸ™

11-02-2017

Mums had to go into the hospital for an op so I’m home alone but it’s actually been okay ☺️ been reading and pottering about although my vision problems have other ideas 😐
The girls at work are literally the CUTEST! Got this : 

Can’t believe I miss work more than anything else!! 
Pain is high today – it’s on another level! 

Body is clearly complaining about my short trip out πŸ€’πŸ€•
Ate a WHOLE bag of dried apricots….πŸ’© we can only pray and hope they work!

Can’t believe it’s been a week since I left hospital….there’s been good days and bad days – but “big journeys start with small steps”

So…. 

It’s hard but Im getting there. The little messages, the inboxes, the snaps they all help and remind me this isn’t a journey I’m doing alone! 

Thank you again for all your support and a special mention for the best momma🐻 love you incredible amounts and thank you for putting up with me daily and picking me up when I’m down πŸ’œ you QUEEN πŸ‘‘

I’m going to keep writing it’s just been hard adjusting to life outside of the hospital bed πŸ˜… the rest of my book is eagerly waiting to be written πŸ˜πŸ“

Release day πŸŽ‰

21:21

It’s the last night. 

No catheter… Marginally worried I might wee the bed πŸ˜«πŸ˜…πŸ™„

21:47

One wee down. 🚽

Medication has come in 3 separate lots and I’m still waiting on sleeping tablets and morphine! πŸ™„πŸ”—πŸ“™

00:14 

Eurgh. Wee. Definitely the best thing about a catheter no waking up! Even better no walking?! πŸƒπŸΌ πŸ˜‚

12:31

So wasn’t woken up for breakfast πŸ™„πŸ˜” 

Physio’s came and got me. Did the stairs at ease today! Phew ☺️

So lunch came but there was no lunch πŸ€” just pudding so last meal is tuna mayo sandwiches 😢

Just a waiting game now.⏰

13:16

Still nothing πŸ˜” I just want to go home 🏑

13:58

Lush 5 mins peace while red head goes to the toilet 

14:54

Mumma🐻 brought in a card and a tub of treats for the hospital staff πŸ’œπŸ‘πŸ­πŸΏπŸͺ


Medication for the next 14 days provided πŸ’‰ including these injections the mother is giving me! 

Just want the ambulance to get here now so i can get out! 🚨🚨🚨🚨

15:52
Still waiting for ambulance ride home πŸ˜”πŸš‘πŸš¨ last time sitting at the window with no real view πŸ™ƒπŸ‘€

Zowie is fast asleep, feel mean waking her up to say goodbye but she’d curse me if not. 

Okay tried to wake her up not a good move πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

16:18

AND IM OUT!!!!!!


People keep asking about my blog – if i read it etc, truth is no. I don’t go back. Not even when I’m writing like this. I write I post I leave. The plan is to read them all once this brace is off. So probably a year from now πŸ˜…β˜ΊοΈ and see how far I’ve come. 

I’ve decided to take a least a week to myself at home to recover in my own surroundings so blog will be quiet until then. After that I’ve decided to write about things that interest and affect me. Going to start with “it takes 7 seconds to judge someone” after all got to give you lot something to keep you busy at night πŸ˜‰πŸ˜΄πŸ˜‚

“Fall seven times. Stand up eight”


Day 15 -as of 00:00 

22:16

Decided to take ALL my tablets (mostly I leave sleeping and loony tabs until 23:30)

22:23 

Nearly fallen ash. 

23:09

There are still visitors πŸ˜’πŸ˜  & not exactly quiet🎈 πŸ“Œ β˜ πŸ”«πŸ”ͺ

Shall discuss tomorrow seemnh

01:38

99/64 BP lovely nurse with dreadlock hair working tonight ☺️ she originally met me on the loony tune ward. She’s super gentle and clearly loves what she does! 

Was telling her about having problems with my ears (finally a sympathetic nurse. Not that they aren’t all because they are….just busy you know?.. I’m also not looking for sympathy!) just need someone to appreciate my ears are effecting my life as much as a fractured spine.  
These bloody zoo whatever sleeping pills are serious. Quickly read back (something I never do..write leave…blog) but I just fell asleep upright! 😴 still solidly working four hours later πŸ’€πŸ˜²πŸ˜΄
05:21

Not sure I can cope with another nose blood like 

111/80

8:42
Medication πŸ’Š

Feel like my throat has been ripped out 😫

10:45

Only just feel like I’m not drugged up 

11:30

So managed the stairs and most of the corridor! 

Had my catheter taken out πŸ˜…πŸ˜… shower time!! 🚿 Can’t express how excited I am!! 

12:54

Took myself to the toilet! All alone! Crutches are a blessing! Just now constantly need a wee 😫🚽

13:09

Quick before the meds kick in. IM GETTING OUT TOMORROW!!!! 

Having a snooze prior to visitors 😴

13:15

Margarita next door just woke me up threw her Zimmer frame and said if she can’t go home no one else can πŸ˜” must be hard. I know I’m going to get better πŸ˜”πŸ˜”

14:14 

Dads here πŸ‘±πŸΌ

15:24

Actually done. Fed up. Done. 

WHY does my body insist on processing fluids so quickly. 

I’m shattered! All I’m doing is having a wee, coming back and by the time I recover I need another wee!

Shakes are ridiculous today. Spilt a whole mug of coffee over myself before. Now I’m trying pour a water and the jug goes flying all over my bed. Done. Tired. Fed up. 

16:03

Had to wee again…lay here now listening to that damn girl argue with the doctors about medication πŸ˜‚πŸ˜« 

Now I know I can go home I just want to leave! 

Guessing my temper is short because I’ve been stuck in here for so long! 

Sophie the staff nurse said she’ll teach mum how to give my daily injections. 

17:21

The last supper 🍽

Put frozen in full blast to drown out everyone out there! 

18:32

Mumma🐻 came they taught her to stab me with the blood thinning needle πŸ’‰πŸ˜…

Although we’ve sat and not done much talking it’s been nice. I had to vacate her for the window seat because I’ve got a right sweat on 

20:12

Mums just left with a bagful of “stuff” it’s amazing how much crap you acquire over two weeks. πŸ˜…πŸ˜‡ 

Really struggling to keep my eyes open after my little wee trip 😴😴

Roll on tomorrow kiddas!!!!

“Determination will get you through anything”

22:21
New lady nurse Antoni she’s lovely ☺️ think she’s covering the ward from what I’ve overheard. 

So I’m just enjoying my peace and quiet then Diane bloody Neilsen comes hopping through on crutches into my ward with a broken heel! Don’t see the crazy bean for years then she turns up here πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ bloody marvellous!! Silly begger got hit by a taxi 

Zowie is high AF on morphine – she’s driving me crazy!!!! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜« told her she’s like a toddler who needs a timeout πŸ™„πŸ˜

23:46
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!!! This new woman is STRIKING at the top of her voice?! This is suppose to be the quiet ward πŸ™„πŸ˜« put her with the other loons πŸ˜πŸ–πŸΌ

Diane just popped down – she’s being kept in over night…against her will from what I can gather πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚

Not impressed with bed 14 though…. 

5:34

This nose bleed is horrific. 

5:54 

Have called in nurse πŸ˜«πŸ€’

08:09

Toast?….if that’s what you can call it

10:29 

Physio 

Crutches issued

Head hurts 

97/65 BP

12:28 

lunch 🍴

12:42

Walked with my crutches ALL BY MYSELF to the toilet!!!

All on my own πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸ‘‘πŸŽ‰

13:39
More Physio!! This time made it to the entrance of the ward! (I touched the door) Got a sweat on but feeling fabulous for it 

15:28

Currently on toilet but lots of visitors today! Ellen and Ella from RH mummy🐻 and Pam C πŸ’œ

Feeling rather loved RN

19:04

So…what a dramatic few hours 

Was lovely the girls came from Reaseheath *shout out to the Reaseheath Rangers and equines*

20:17

Thought it was best to wait until my mood improved to blog…let me explain why!

Right so it was a lovely surprise that Ellen and Ella came even though I’m sure they’d told me I was snoozing when they arrived – a nice wake up call instead of that crazy old man! They brought my flowers which mum has had to take home as the nurses told them off πŸ™„πŸ˜‚ I was also treated to a huge bar of dairy milk and the best yet a bottle of cordial! 🍾


Then mummy🐻 and Pam C came (with post!) turns out my pal Sophie has been up to no good contacting Manchester United! 


Not often you receive a personal letter from MU! 

Pam has promised to bring Skye (her gorgeous puppy) round when I get out! She can help me recover and give me reason to walk more 🐢

About 4:15 the head nurse – who frankly has been a bitch to me all day asked rather rudely for my guests to leave. I’ve questioned this because no one else seems to receive the same treatment?! They have “open visitation” why? My friends drove well over an hour to see me I’m not going to ask them to leave. Not like we were having a piss up and massive party? 

So around half past the girls left and a man arrive. Turns out he was from citizens advice to be “helpful”. Helpful my arse! He basically sat on a chair and spoke so quietly I could hardly hear. Baring in mind I’m having so many problems with my ears with balance etc, let alone having to strain to hear him 😑 couldn’t even sit up because I put all my effort in to visitation!! πŸ˜’ eurgh makes me annoyed thinking about it.!.

So Pam and M🐻 left and my tea arrived –

Stupid man still here and I ended up telling him to leave. He was trying to tell me I should sue my friend for falling off her horse. ARE YOU ******* MAD!!!!! I’m an equine, I’m well aware that my life style involves risk. I’m not sure how many times I told him but I ended up getting really shitty with him. P***k. 😑😑😑😑

So he FINALLY left and I ate my now COLD ❄️ tea. Roast beef and potatoes with a soggy Yorkshire, cauliflower and broccoli. Considering it was cold and wet I enjoyed it. Jeeze get me out of here!!! I’m enjoying hospital food. No. Just no. πŸ–πŸΌ

The father came shortly after and basically got it all in the ear 

I screamed 

I bitched

I grumped 

I pooped

And then I cried. 

He abided by the rules and left at 8pm BUT I can hear there’s visitors here (now 20:44)

I’ve shut my curtains so I’m in my own little green prison. Music on full blast and writing this. 

I felt bad before I heard Zowie from across the way crying before. I wanted to go give her a hug πŸ˜” just shows even the strongest people on the outside struggle. 

It’s been 14 days…

My mental health is all over place! 

I’m a wreck.

Can’t even decide if the new meds are working as I’m stuck in here and it’s pushing my stress levels over the edge. 

20:50 

Not going to post until there’s something more positive to say πŸ˜…πŸ™„

These beauties keep me smiling πŸ˜šπŸ‘―

There’s a new Irish lady on the ward – I briefly spoke to her, she’s lived all over and said Manchester is the her favourite place πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸ‘‘ cute queen. 

21:08
H A N D O V E R

I am not what happened to me –Β I am what I choose to becomeΒ 

23:22

I was tagged in a facebook post that I laughed at so much, the poor biddy who happens to be my neighbour got a hell of a shock and woke up πŸ˜‚πŸ˜«πŸ˜‚πŸ˜«πŸ˜‚πŸ˜«
00:54

Parrot is acting strange …. “She’s shouting so you like me now?” Repeatedly…now it’s “C L I C L” over and over. Can’t figure it out. poorly, lonely 😫don’t EVER let me I reach that! Kill me first. Please!.!.!

Managed to attempted to braide my hair πŸ™„πŸ˜”


01:26 

Parrots woken EVERYONE UP. Humm second thoughts it’s not parrot. It’s the Indian lady on the end. My curtains are drawn because I wanted peace before. Humm clearly not 
11:59

What a busy morning!!

So….Started with a nose bleed 😐😳 

Then physio’s got me up and I walked to the shower and ACTUALLY HAD A SHOWER! 🚿🚿🚿 well as much as you can with a brace holding you together. 

THEN I walked back practically on my own!!!! 

Sean has moved on to my ward now! Turns out Jean (shrieking cat lady) has moved out to a home. 

13:08
Lunch was fish and peas with pineapple upside down cake. 😍

Currently sitting on my chair drinking coffee and looking out the window. Road to recovery here we come! 

Also got to shave my armpits before hehe no longer a cave woman! πŸ™ˆπŸ» 

13:29 
πŸ™„ hummmm somehow cut my face πŸ”ͺ

105/59 BP is settling…

Mums here!! 

16:13

So after long long long talks with Physio and OT’s it’s finally sorted the “help” I’m getting at home – so like a raised toilet seat and a “stick/crutch” etc was easier for them to talk to MummaBear my heads in the clouds ☁️

Walked to the shower room again when mum was here and only had a few ‘funny moments’  

GOT POST! Lovely card off Aunty Rachel πŸ’œ & a large package of Sophie, David, Lexi and Leila (snails) with cards, notes, letters, pictures and a gold coin which I shared with my mummy πŸ˜‰πŸ˜πŸ‘‘


Stairs are the next challenge 😐
17:38

Tea was macaroni cheese couldn’t even finish it πŸ˜” got bad belly ache and stopped going to the toilet πŸ’©

It’s been nice with Sean back on the same ward! Someone to natter to that doesn’t make you feel like he’s got something better to do. 

Also Ewa she’s becoming my favourite nurse! Definitely favourite in green ✳️

19:19

Dad just left and Mumma🐻 arrived she’s treating me to a sexy shower cap hair wash πŸ’†πŸΌ


Then Sean photo bombed us!! 


21:34

My mum is literally my rock πŸ’œ I wouldn’t be here without her!!

I have pretty French plaites in now and sort of clean hair πŸ‘§πŸΌ 


Sean had a play on mums scooter πŸ˜‚πŸ

There’s a lady next to Zoe (red head) who arrived today, she’s refusing treatment? Are you mad? I’m not going to go in to detail but it’s not looking good. Scary really. 

Next door to me – margarita (yes named after said pizza πŸ˜…πŸ• looks sooo poorly today honestly I’m rather worried πŸ˜” she looks so small and frail 

Silent witness now then bed πŸ“Ί

First a few cutie with my ultimate favourite πŸ˜˜πŸ‘‘πŸ’œπŸ’—

“I’m not broken but I’m pretty damn dented”

23:54

Completely forgot to tell you all!!!!! A man escaped from the men’s ward and got jnto here! I was fast asleep (yes during the middle of the day) and he scared the living daylights out of me! He was pointing out the window saying he was going home! Crazy fool was high AF! Honestly it was NOT the wake up call I wanted πŸ˜«πŸ˜‚

00:08

Lauren student nurse – first person all day to tell me they’ll replace my wristband and actually have! There were 4 prior members of staff they told me they would πŸ˜‚ #busybunnies 🐰 she said she writes lists or she’d forget! Something I’d do ☺️

01:25

95/62

05:14

99/56

10:04

Physio – walked to the door! That’s nearly escaping!!

Back is killing me and feet have turned a strange bluey/red colour πŸ™„ they’ve left me in my chair so I’m tempted to nap here  

10:50

113/66 had a nice little chat with Vinny ☺️ 

11:01 

Parrot is shouting “where’s my teeth?” Repeatedly they’ve given her, her dentures and she put them in the wrong way πŸ˜‚πŸ˜… poor babe! 

Got a new top on today πŸ¦„πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸ’πŸΌ bought some pants so I can actually wear something other than a gown. eBay queen πŸ‘‘

11:46

CT scan now 

Rocking some seriously sexy prison pants πŸ˜‚πŸ˜«πŸ‘–

13:49

BP 86/48 very low even for me!! Temp is 37.8 πŸ€’πŸ€• 

Feel like CRAP 

14:11

Just spoke to Italian doctor πŸ˜‡ CT was clear. Salford spinal team are happy with my X-rays and I have a follow up in 4 weeks. Basically as soon as physio’s are 

happy IM FREE !!! πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰

14:32

Think nurse has forgotten about me…still in the toilet πŸ™„πŸš½

19:13

Tried to sleep it off…still feel like utter crap! Temp is 37.8 & BP 98/61 πŸ˜”

21:12

So lovely to FINALLY see Amber after nearly a year apart! Thank you Emma for bringing her ☺️ know mum wanted to see her too so felt guilty but just an excuse to invite her round when in out! 

Feels really strange – people keep telling me I’m an inspiration?! You mad I’m literally nothing different to what I imagine everyone else doing? Yeah I keep a blog but thinks that’s it? 

Been feeling really really off colour today but surprisingly I’m say up planning my lessons for when I’m allowed back in the ring πŸ˜…πŸ˜«



22:56

24 weeks of lessons planned πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸ‘‘πŸ’πŸΌ sorry but queen of organisation over here πŸ˜‰ bless Libby for helping me and letting me think out loud πŸ—£
Missing my mummy lots and lots πŸ’œπŸ‘―πŸ˜”

“The Humming Bird”

The Humming Bird
10:26

Feel like I’ve walked a marathon! Literally walked half the ward and back. I WILL get out of here!! πŸ‘£

Another poop of my own accord πŸ’ͺπŸΌπŸ™ˆπŸ’πŸΌ life’s looking up 

11:04

FINALLY doctors came and turns out CT was cancelled on Friday. So being sent for another one and a standing X-ray. Looks like a major possibility I’m getting out this week πŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸŽ‰

13:32 

Mum came this morning with toast and PROPER coffee! β˜•οΈ πŸ’œ even some jam 🍞

Mixed things up a bit and had tuna salad for lunch 🍴

14:36 

Pooped again πŸ’© 

I’ve never actually appreciated my body working properly. 

I’ve got my own sports bra and t-shirt on πŸ‘š the first time I feel “normal” in days 


I’ve been described as a “humming bird” as they are either going 100mph or they are asleep πŸ˜‚πŸ˜… definitely me. 

Rachel sent me a picture of my favourite mare Ellie is cheered me something special! (This will be the first day I haven’t cried since I arrived….lets hope) 


15:31 

I’m still sitting up! Although so with the help of my bed. Shattered 😴 nurses are pleased I’ve broken a nail as it’s easier for them to take obs πŸ˜₯😐

16:19

Watching one of my all time favourite films – pitch perfect πŸ˜πŸ˜… 🎢 tryna not to sing along πŸ˜‚πŸ˜

20:27

So they came and took me off for a standing X-ray πŸ˜‚πŸŒš banter. I nearly chundered over the X-ray man. Standing up is not a strong suit ATM πŸ™„πŸ˜…

Came back to a cold tea which again I mixed up again, macaroni cheese πŸ§€

Mumma bear came with treats even though she’s not feeling well!?! 

Pitch perfect finished but I couldn’t resist to sing along with it at the end πŸ˜‚πŸ™Š 

New lady moved on to the ward – don’t know her name but she’s not broken?! On the wrong ward because there are no beds. 

21:39

Yesssssss!! Finally temperature under 37!! BP – 97/65 πŸ’πŸΌ 

Third film of the day- X men, days of future past πŸ‘½

All in all a good day. πŸ’ͺ🏼